Christians are going to dating workshops to learn how to flirt

Why are Christians so weird sometimes?

Jackie Elton, founder of the agency, said that the number of people using Christian dating sites has doubled over the past year.

“There’s been a massive rise in internet dating sites as Christians are struggling to find a partner in church,” she said.

“They know what they want, but many congregations are too small or have a gender imbalance that makes it really difficult for them.

“As a result they are not getting the kind of experience they need and that’s why they are turning to the workshops.”

I’m afraid that these workshops are just a bunch of socially-awkward people teaching each other how to interact with other socially-awkward people. In the end, I’m not so sure that this changes anything because it’s still just a place where the same people are in the same room with each other, except now the interest in finding another mate is explicitly right there on the table. No guessing games here.

At the end of the linked article above, there’s a list of Christian pick-up lines that sound so ridiculous that only a Christian could have come up with them. Seriously, this is embarrassing.

Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives. He never met you.’

‘Is this pew taken?’

‘I just don’t feel called to celibacy.’

‘You float my ark.’

‘I didn’t believe in predestination until tonight.’

‘My parents are home, wanna come over?’

‘Is that a thinline, duo-tone, compact, ESV travel bible in your pocket?’

‘Let me sell you an indulgence - it’s a sin to look as good as you.’

‘How many times do I have to walk around you before you fall for me?”

‘I like to arrange the substantial Christian section of my bookshelf into alphabetical order. Coffee?”

‘The name is Will. God’s Will.’

When will the madness end?!